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HomeHEALTHThree schools rejected our son with autism out of ignorance –Parents

Three schools rejected our son with autism out of ignorance –Parents

Autism Spectrum Disorder is a group of neurological conditions that usually manifests in early childhood. These conditions are usually characterised by abnormalities in communication skills as well as deficits in social interactions. Some parents who were able to spot the health disorder early and initiated therapy spoke on the benefits of early intervention. One of the parents also shared how three schools rejected their son with ASD out of ignorance. AMARACHI OKEH reports

 When a paediatrician told Mrs. Joy Ibemere that her two-year-old son, Sinobichukwu was autistic, she went cold and numb. It was difficult for her to process. When she eventually got home from the hospital that day, she fainted while just thinking about the challenge she had to face to raise the child.

She knew about the autistic disorder vaguely and never imagined it is something that she would ever have to deal with until her son was diagnosed with mild autism. What was more puzzling to her was that her son never exhibited the typical signs she would later read of.

The mother of three recounting how she felt at the diagnosis said, “It hit me badly because I was afraid for him and his future. The stigma, the lack of knowledge of the condition in the country, and then coupled with the doctor’s report that he has to live with the condition for the rest of his life.

“But the doctor was quick to reassure me that with therapy, everything would be fine if we start therapy on time.”

In no time, the family employed a therapist whose effort the mother said is now paying off.

Before the diagnosis, Mrs. Ibemere said she felt something was wrong when her son would sometimes not respond when called but was excelling at every other developmental milestone.

At 18 months of age, her maternal intuition kicked in. She could no longer discard the signs she was seeing in her child.

She told PUNCH HealthWise that “At 18 months, I noticed that sometimes you’d call him and he would not respond. I thought it was him being naughty at that time and this was a bit tricky because he hit all the developmental milestones on time.

“By then, he was already reciting his alphabet. He could recite his ABCs forward and backward. He could recite up to 50 so I was a bit confused.

“He could feed himself, and climb the stairs, but my issue was that he wasn’t responding to his name. I found it weird, I thought it was him being naughty.

“Once in a while, he would utter ‘mama.’ He’d just say it and move on but it wasn’t a recurring thing for him but he recognised me as his mum but he just wouldn’t respond to his name.

“I thought it was because he is a male child, he was trying to be stubborn. Then I decided that I would observe him till he turned two years old. At least by two years, he should be able to utter some words,” she said.

When at two years of age nothing changed, Mrs. Ibemere reached out to a paediatrician friend who first told her that her son may be autistic

“I said God forbid! By this time, I knew what autism was but I didn’t understand it.”

The friend then referred her to a specialist for observation.

That was when she learned her son had a mild case of autism disorder.

Swifty and on the recommendation of the paediatrician, the Ibemeres enrolled a therapist and within three months, the mother said she could see changes in her son.

But before employing a therapist, the mother admitted that she feared for the future of her son. She was afraid he wasn’t going to live a normal life like other kids but when the therapist was employed and she began to see good changes in the boy, she realised that she had nothing to worry about and that her son is brilliant.

She had wondered how he would be treated and how he would respond to treatment.

“I can see that he can do things for himself and he has even been enrolled in a school and he is doing amazingly well.

“This autism is like a blessing in disguise. He is reading and can add his numbers. He can write. Right now, I don’t have any fears about the future. I know he can take care of himself. He is normal. That someone’s perception of life is different doesn’t mean he is abnormal,” she said.


Worried when one-year-old son couldn’t speak

Another couple with a child with ASD who spoke with PUNCH HealthWise was Mr. and Mrs. Kehinde Asishana. They were initially not alert to the condition until the child was about a year old.

•A child with an autism spectrum disorder. Image credit: Aljazeera

It was when his sister, at seven months, began babbling ‘mama’ that Mr. and Mrs. Asishana knew something was wrong with their first child, Onovide, who is one year older than his sister but wasn’t speaking yet.

What was more puzzling for the mother, Mrs. Asishana was that her son’s birth mate at that same age could speak both Yoruba and English fluently. She then went to a private hospital to find out what the problem was.

“We went to a private hospital where we were assigned a paediatrician who assigned a therapist to us. He had a hearing assessment and was certified perfect, then another assessment was required.

“During this particular assessment, he was throwing tantrums, turning the lights off and on, unconsciously to me, I didn’t know that those are signs of a disorder.

“When they finished the assessment, the therapist told me that my son is autistic and this is affecting his speech although it is mild. He said my son had ASD level 2.”

The Ogun state indigene said she was shocked. She recalled that her son at that period was always hyperactive, climbing the windows in addition to throwing tantrums, but noted that she never read any meaning into it.

“The therapist said if I don’t work on it on time, he may not talk. That he needs a therapist that would be with him to engage him always,” Mrs. Asishana said.

She, however, noted that before the diagnosis, people had told her and her husband that something was different about their son, disclosing that she had always brushed the concerns off because he didn’t have any other visible markers or delays until two years when he couldn’t talk and didn’t even make any attempt at it.

The school thought my son was dumb

More saddening, Mrs. Asishana said, was that even the school she had enrolled the boy into knew something was different but never bothered to share their observation with the family.

“Even in his school, they assumed he was dumb. The funny thing is that we go for open days in the school and nobody cared to tell us what they had observed in the child.

“When the teacher asks questions in class, they never bother asking him or engaging him. They only let him write and that is all.

“We go for open days, meetings and not one person from his school said anything. He was rather segregated and this is a private school that is considered very expensive in the neighbourhood we live in.

“Assuming we didn’t engage a therapist that observed him in the school, we would have been ignorant of how he was treated in school.

“In fact, the school administration said he thought he was dumb until we started therapy and the therapist was with him 24/7 in class.

“It was the therapist we employed that made efforts to integrate the boy into the school activities before they noticed that he could talk. The problem was not that he cannot hear, he could hear but he had a problem expressing himself,” the mother said.

Also speaking with our correspondent, Mr. Asishana also stressed that it was disappointing that the school did not reach out to the family about what they observed about their son.

“I found that they are not knowledgeable about the disorder. I won’t blame them totally because they don’t know,” Mr. Asishana, who is a software engineer, said.

But even after the condition was detected, allowing the therapist into the school was another hurdle for the family to cross.

The mother of two narrated that because they didn’t understand the peculiarity of their son, it was a struggle to even allow the therapist into the class. The school didn’t want to hear of it and the class teachers were opposed to the idea.

After lots of back and forth with the school, he was eventually taken out, and finding a suitable school for him wasn’t as easy as just registering in a new school and paying the fees, he said.

Three schools rejected our son because of the disorder

Three different schools had rejected him due to his peculiarity and the fact that he needed his therapist nearby.

“I felt really bad and had to ask them, ‘what happens to other children who have it worse than this and don’t know?

“How do you make their parents aware and how would their parents feel?” Mrs. Asishana asked.



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